preparing to be known

Oct 2

Dear Reader,

Belonging is one of the most ordinary human needs, and one of the most complicated.

We long for people who understand us and make us feel less alone in our inner world. Yet for many, that longing is unmet. Life feels full of acquaintances and obligations but thin on true connection.

In therapy, people sometimes ask how to find that kind of belonging. It is not a simple answer, because belonging cannot be forced. But it can be cultivated both in how we live with ourselves and in how we make space for others.

Often, the work begins in solitude. Learning to sit with ourselves without constant distraction. Practicing honesty about what we want, what we fear, and what we hope for. When we can extend presence inward, it becomes easier to recognize and receive it from someone else.

From there, belonging is about noticing where small signals of resonance already exist. The colleague who listens with genuine attention. The neighbor who lingers in conversation a little longer than expected. The one person in a room where you feel less need to perform. These are the beginnings of being known.

Finding where we are known grows slowly, from moments of honesty, attention, and care. But even in seasons of aloneness we can cultivate the soil, so that when connection does arrive, we are able to recognize it, and ready to let it take root.

Yours in the journey,